Photo by Nelson

Navy felt cloche with velvet bow-gifted, vintage green gloves and navy jacket-estate sales, green neck warmer-Xeino, navy diane von furstenberg pants-consignment store.

Flirting, posing and laughing with Nelson through the lens as the feather neck warmer softly teases my chin, The Style Crone gets ready to run out the door for appointments and errands.  As the day progresses, I reflect on the events of the past week and how advocating for a loved one in the health care system takes constant hypervigilance and the ability to be flexible when a status change occurs. There is a fine line, a tight rope to walk, to assure that Nelson gets what he needs.  Constant assertiveness in the form of ‘a broken record’ with just the right tone of voice, firm, but not too pressured so as not to alienate health care providers. Emotions must be put aside as much as possible until there is a safe place to express myself because Nelson’s welfare is the priority in this precarious situation.  So many things can go wrong and I’ve seen way too much in my own health care career of 50 years, so that nothing shocks me. But underneath all of that I feel vulnerable and frightened, sometimes frustrated, powerless, and impatient.  So today, I flirt!  And wear feathers with green and navy!


  1. Having been in a “health care advocate” situation when my son was a baby, I can relate! Sometimes it just seems like the battles never end. Love your navy and green here! I’m a recent convert to navy, and am always impressed at how well it “plays with others.”

  2. You acknowledge your vulnerability, strength, creativity, resourcefulness and positivity all in this one concise post, all the while looking gorgeous. I’m so pleased to have found you here.
    All the best to you and Nelson. x

  3. I stand in awe of what you have to go through, all the while looking like you’re just on a day out and having a holiday, as if you haven’t a care in the world. For what it’s worth, I do think you have the right approach of being firm, reasonable, and never making what is a deeply personal negotiation on Nelson’s behalf, being about “being right.” Good on ya, girl! (They don’t know who they are dealing with!!)

    Shrewsbury, England

  4. Judith,
    You are beautiful. I commend your way of being! Love to you and Nelson. I am very glad that your scare last week brought you both home to bring in the NewYear! May it be your best ever.

  5. Look at the response THE TRUTH gets…how to be assertive, flirt, face disaster, smile, laugh, love and be the warrior princess you are…and look divine doing it. Keep telling the truth…it is complicated and it is life. You are life. Nelson, you handsome man, is life. And truth!

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