Photo by Nelson
Amy Downs black/white hat, yoga pants and tunic, black/white hand painted boots-vintage shop close out, jewelry-estate sales.
Today Nelson had a liver biopsy to determine the cause of his elevated liver enzymes which have prevented him from receiving chemo for about two months. The Style Crone’s outfit is her armor as we leave home with a sense of internal crumbling, like the brick front steps of our home which are deteriorating due to lack of attention. Over the past six years our priorities have not included home repairs. Even corrective clothing cannot conceal my waning sense of confidence, although if need be I know I have something in me which would surface if my hypervigilance would reveal an issue requiring necessary action in a medical setting. Call it body/mind memory that is always lying in wait. I believe that my feelings of uncertainty are related to the long term sense of helplessness and powerlessness to change the events that unfold before us.
Nelson’s procedure is performed in interventional radiology, and as the physician floats into the waiting area I am aware that she could moonlight as a model, with her long blond hair and blue scoop neck tee accessorized with a turquoise stethoscope. Her attention to detail is reassuring! If someone is going to stick a needle into the liver of your loved one, let it be someone who is compulsively and meticulously into detail. The entire staff is efficient with a touch of kindness, which is always a welcomed relief and we are grateful. Kindness and empathy are the bottom line in the health care arena, and we have found that these qualities are not always included in our experience. The results should be revealed within a week and we are very weary.